“Should” is one of those words that seems quite innocuous but seems to cause a lot of stress when you use it.
I’ve made a bit of a resolution for 2013 – not to go with the ‘shoulds’ so much.
I have trouble sometimes, separating my me-time from work time. It’s the downside of having the desk, sofa and TV all in one room. Sometimes things can get a little bit overlappy! I tell myself I *should* answer that work email that’s come through on my phone at 8pm, I just need to fire up the laptop and send that ever-so-important document RIGHT NOW.
I tell myself I*should* tidy up the kitchen even though I’ve literally just sat down after working non-stop and then cooking dinner.
I convince myself that I *should* work on a weekend if I’m home alone “just to get it done.”
I find myself sitting down after I’ve switched off the computer, telling myself that I *should* write a blog or I *should* go on Twitter and do some networking.
Just recently I’ve been trying to interrupt these shoulds and ask myself what I actually want to do. The shoulds don’t tend to crop up around things that I know I have to do, like deadlines and paying bills. No, they appear to nag me into doing something that isn’t strictly necessary at that moment, but that I feel as if I ought to do it to keep someone happy. Or to live up to the ridiculously high standards I try to set myself and invariably can’t maintain!
I suspect my shoulds are one of the reasons I rebel and eat too much. I know I *should* put the chocolates down, but I don’t want to.
Anyway, 2013 will be the year I banish SHOULD. If I need to, I will, if it can wait, it will and if I don’t need to, I won’t stress over it.
Oh, but I REALLY should go and empty the dryer…